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Create a trigger in your life that builds your gratitude muscle. This could be: a 2-minute journal to end the day about what you are grateful for a sincere thank you a picture on your desk For MG , his trigger is this photo that hangs in his office. It's from a trip to Mali during their famine in 1984. Red Cross workers would measure children's arms. If too big, they did not receive the limited food ration b/c they could survive with no food. If too small, they did not receive the food ration b/c they would most likely die with or without the ration. Your arm had to be the "middle length" to get any of the rations. Be grateful for what you have. No matter the disappointment or supposed tribulation, do not whine or complain, do not get angry, do not last out atanotherperson to express your entitlement. You are not better than anyone else. Other people's (children's) terrible fate, undeserved and tragic, could have been your fate.

  Anger and embarrassment are often close relatives. Sometimes we get defensive about what we feel guilty about. Our brain and our ego tell us the "facts." Our heart and gut tell us the "feelings." Facts make us look good and minimize the feelings of how we've hurt the other person. Apologizing is hard to do well. It's scary so we avoid the pain of admitting we were wrong (or at least that we are partially responsible for the problem in the first place.) Everyone has a different version of how things went down and it gets really hard to sort out "facts" from "feelings." Stop the negative spiral downwards by: taking a deep breathe identifying what matters most (maintain this friendship etc) identifying what you authentically can say "I'm sorry" for do it. Say "I'm sorry" do not say "but", do not explain why you are still in the right after you say "sorry" Thank you AP .

Realizing the space between where you currently are (your reality) and where you want to be (your vision) makes you feel tension . It's uncomfortable to realize you are not where you want to be. It's motivating to imagine and work towards building something important to you. Two main barriers stop us from accomplishing our visions: A belief in our own powerlessness: "I don't have any influence or ability to change this situation." A belief in our unworthiness: "Who am I to make a change? It's not okay for me to insert myself. I don't have the right to make this decision and take this action." These barriers pull us away from our vision; they work to keep us rooted in our current reality. Be aware of the beliefs that are holding you back. Remember that feeling the tension means you are on the right path to accomplishing your vision. Thank you PS .

We live in the safest period in human history. Data on data on data supports this. The information we see and talk about matters. The media often tells a different story than the reality, which is a decrease in violence/wars, and an increase in access to food, education/literacy, and health care over the past centuries. We do not understand how bad the past was, so we do not understand how much better our present reality really is. In addition to being pessimistic about the future, we are also unaware of past improvements. And this gets really tricky because there are still awful injustices across our country and globe for large groups of people. If we over-focus on the truth of our evil, we become jaded and hopeless. If we over-focus on the optimistic reality that, as a world, things are getting better, we discredit the real pain and suffering millions are unnecessarily experiencing. The solution: be real about the bad and intentional in sharing real stories of hope. Balance this ...

Autonomy means doing what you believe is best because you think that is what needs to happen. Autonomy does not mean doing what you think others want you to do. Too often, we add meaning by personalizing someone else’s action. “ That person doesn’t drink alcohol because they think they are better than I.” Or “my co-worker is staying late in the office, hmmm, I guess I have to stay late too if I want to be viewed as a team player.” These are false stories that most often serve no one. 99% + of the time, the action of person A has no causation or relation to the action of person B. Remember, you are one of 7.6 billion people on this planet right now. Or one of about the 108.2 billion people in the history of Earth that have ever been lucky enough to live on this planet. The actions of others do not define what the best action for you is. Identify your best path forward. And then follow it. Do not be unnecessarily swayed by the actions of others. The crowd misleads you. There is no guilt...

Do we define a child based on their behavior? Or do we understand what is going on in their brain and nervous system? When a child acts up it's not the child choosing to be "bad" it's the child seeking connection. A child has to have the skill of regulating their emotions (being able to calm down) before they are able to learn & retain information. And building the skill of regulation comes through relationships of support. Instead of going away from the child (or adult) who is behaving badly, we need to go towards it. Easier said than done.