Don't adopt anxiety

Anxiety does not produce good work. Unfortunately, anxiety spreads like wildfire from one person to the next. The goal of an anxious person is to spread their anxiety to you. They feel validated and thus better by you also feeling anxious. Avoid this downward spiral. It's a trap.

When someone else is spewing anxiety, remember to:

1. Remain calm: freaking out makes things worse, not better. "Let's figure out how to take care of this.”
2. Be empathetic: acknowledge the person's anxiety without adopting it. Repeat the concern back to the person, then say, "I can understand why this is a concern.”
3. Be clear: do not overpromise or overreact. "We are going to look into this.”

Things not to do in response to others’ anxiety: 

-promise to do more work

-promise you'll work all night to solve it 

-promise to do anything other than look into it

The most important thing is that the anxiety stops with you. Do not turn around and spread the anxiety to your team, family, etc.

Thank you, Mike.

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